The Saturday Texas Journal:

A soldier from The Netherlands training in Central Texas said: "I have never been in a place where I experienced all four seasons in two short weeks." Buh-dah-boom.

There are historical markers all along the Texas backroads. There are virtually no pull-outs. When reading these markers close up, try not make history by being squashed like a bug by pickups going over 70 MPH. Buh-dah-boom.

A small town in Central Texas is named *Ding Dong*...after the not so notorious Bell brothers. Buh-dah-buh-dah-ding-dong.

By the main gate on the post, there is huge expanse of bluebonnets followed in a few weeks by tons of black-eyed Susans and other wild flowers. But there is absolutely no way to get near them to take photos or smell the flowers without risking MP encounters. Hoo-rah!

Know how Texans know people are new to the Lone Star State? Newcomers get wild-eyed at every tornado alert, and are constantly on the alert for places to shelter their cars from the hellish hail stones big enough to knock a hard-headed longhorn silly. Watch the skies! I mean it! Ka-Boom!

Speaking of *lone stars*...Texas is nicknamed the Lone Star State to signify that it was a former independent republic. This is still the ardent desire of many Texans. (The lone star on the flag is a sort of like a Confederate flag...hiding in plain sight.) They mean it! Boom!

Lest you take my journal entries as a sign I am assimilating, note that I have gone from saying that the whole state of Texas sucks, to pointing out the nuanced ways in which the state of Texas sucks.

I can only close by saying: Ted Cruz for President? I refer you to the movie *King of Hearts.* The asylum gates are truly wide open in Texas and the lunatics think that since they run the state, they should run the country, too,

I presume I shall not run short of fodder for my journal cannon, as long as I am *Stuck in Lodi* again (so to speak).

Giddie-up and Hoo-rah!